Since I started this blog I have received 23 messages from people who want to get into the world of CTS as a client (22 men and 1 woman). They want to know how they should go about finding, booking, and enjoying their first encounter with a sex worker.
That first encounter can be a very big deal. A good experience can leave you hooked on this world. A bad experience could leave a person angry or hurt. And there is the very real possibility that a person could have a complete failure to even get a first encounter. Frankly, the list of things that could go wrong is longer than the list of what could go right.
I can’t give out a set of instructions on how to go about getting into this. Unfortunately, “prostitution” remains a crime in most jurisdictions, and giving detailed instructions might be seen as somehow facilitating that crime. But I can talk about the experience in broad terms, especially my own.
I will start by saying that perhaps the easiest and least stressful way of having your first experience with a sex worker is to go somewhere that has legal sex work. This will immediately eliminate any stress from fear of getting arrested. It also dramatically increases the chance of a successful first encounter (at least in terms of booking an appointment). Brothels in Nevada or in other countries can often provide a relaxing, easy, and legal outlet for this kind of sexual exploration. But this is not always an available option. After all, a trip to The Netherlands is pretty expensive.
Outside of brothels, legal or otherwise, scheduling for the first time can take a while. If this is something you want to do, be patient. Be prepared to answer questions you may not have thought of.
You are going to be nervous. Expect it. Deal with it. But not chemically. Drinking or using any sort of drug (prescription or other) is a bad idea. It could ruin your experience very easily.
My first experience was incredibly nerve-wracking, especially in the lead up to the date. She was an escort coming to my apartment (an “outcall” appointment). I honestly did not know what to expect. I was only 22 years old. New in town and lonely. So I gave it a try. Thankfully, once she arrived and we got comfortable, she was able to put me at ease. But up until then, I felt like I was going to break. My hands were literally shaking when I went to answer the door!
So expect to be nervous. If you know it’s coming, you can deal with it and not be so affected by it.
Have whatever you need on hand. You don’t want to be looking for things. Nothing ruins the mood quite like having to search for condoms all over the place. Your sex worker may very well have condoms, but you should too. And anything else you need for your date should be close at hand. When I go to a lady (an “incall” appointment), I make sure I have what I needed either in my pockets or in the small backpack I carry. The backpack might seem odd to some people, but I keep a change of underwear, t-shirt, socks, deodorant, baby wipes, and a few other things in it. I know where everything is, and it keeps everything together.
Do your research as best you can. The more you know about things before you play, the better. Seriously, you don’t play a sport without knowing the rules. So don’t play this game unprepared. There is more information online than you can imagine, so there is really no excuse for not being informed.
Good hygiene is a must. There is no excuse not to be clean if you are hosting, but you should also be good and clean if they are hosting. If you have to go to your date from work, let him or her know in advance and ask to shower at their place. I have never had a sex worker refuse me a chance to get clean. They understand if you are coming from work and not from home. Some clients play on their lunch breaks! Being clean is a must. And some workers will be more than willing to help you get clean, which is it’s own kind of fun!
Okay, here is a big one. Be nice. Men: be a gentleman! Women: be a lady! Politeness, kindness, and gentleness go a long way. Things can be nasty and dirty during sex if that’s how you want it, but everything else should be very civiliazed. When communicating, no one should be rude. Ever. It’s fine if the communication naturally turns flirty and maybe even a little filthy. But that is not how you should ever approach someone. Initial contact should always be polite and respectful. Save the dirty talk for the main event.
There isn’t much more I can write without getting into some potential legal pitfalls, so I will leave it at this. It can be quite a challenge getting involved in this world. And it can be a bit dangerous. But most of us find it very rewarding. That is why we keep doing it. That is why we want it decriminalized. This may be morally wrong to some, but it shouldn’t be illegal for everyone.
Be safe. Have fun. Stay smart.
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