Tips vs Gifts

I recently conducted a completely unscientific poll on social media to find out whether Sex Workers prefer cash tips or gifts from clients.  I had expected something of an even split, especially considering how many ladies promote their Amazon “wish lists” or other gift options on social media.  I was wrong.

The poll–conducted across Switter, Twitter, and Instagram–had some pretty unequivocal results.

Ladies want the money.

89% of respondents said that they preferred cash tips to gifts.  Only 11% preferred gifts.

While it isn’t much of a surprise that a majority of Sex Workers would prefer the money–it is sex WORK after all–I was a bit surprised by the actual numbers.

Perhaps this is based off of a couple of personal biases.  I enjoy giving gifts to my favorite ladies (which reminds me that I owe a gift to someone!) and the responses from ladies that I give gifts to have always been very positive.  This likely swayed my opinion that more than 11% of Sex Workers would prefer gifts.  That is a clear demonstration of how personal experiences can bias opinions.

So, how can Clients make use of these numbers?  Clearly the overwhelming majority of Sex Workers would prefer a cash tip from their clients.  Does this mean we Clients should just skip the gifts and leave tips?

No.  As stated at the outset, this was a very unscientific poll.  I cannot say that the Sex Workers who responded represent a proper cross-section of Sex Worker demographics.  There were also just two options, with no way to gauge HOW MUCH they preferred cash tips over gifts.  So while the raw numbers do indicate a preference for cash overall, it is not a clear guide of what to do.

So which is better?  What should Clients do?

Honestly, it’s up to the client.

Tips are a nice way to show appreciation for a good time.  Many Sex Workers have posted online that any tip is a nice gesture.  Though, let’s be clear, just dropping a few one dollar bills on the table like you would at a diner would be insulting.  As a general rule $20 would be a minimum tip, though more might be appropriate.  10-15% might be thought of as a lower end tip, and that could often be a lot more than $20.

Frankly, figuring out how much to tip makes me uncomfortable.  I wonder what she would think about the amount. Would she think it too little? Too much? Plus, am I now creating an expectation of how much I will tip during repeat visits?  If I tipped less the second time, would she think that this means I found her less satisfying?  Seriously, I’m getting stressed just thinking about it.

Now gifts, gifts are different.  Gifts can be fun.  Some Sex Workers make giving gifts very easy by having “wish lists” online.  Just pick something out that you already know she likes.  Easy.  And no stress.  She chose it after all, so you know she is going to like it.

I prefer giving gifts.  Especially with ladies that I know their personalities.  I get to pick out things that fit who they are.  It is more special.  More personal.  It can also be more memorable.  I feel as though gifts help to build rapport with the Sex Worker, to build the relationship, and this seems to make things get better over time.  It isn’t that it leads to “extras” during future sessions, but it leads to a better connection and therefore better sessions.  I feel as though gifts help build the connection that leads to sessions feeling very “natural”–for lack of a better word.

But this is just my opinion.  Each Client needs to do what they are most comfortable with and what they feel is best for them.  I think we can be clear that Sex Workers like their tips.  But they also like gifts.  Which is given is up to the Client.  And Clients should not feel as though wither is required behavior–after all, a “mandatory” tip is not really a tip.  But tipping and gift giving are truly good ideas.

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4 comments

  1. Cash is always king, with that said, it’s rare to get tips or gifts so either is always appreciated. No matter how no big or small and it doesn’t have to happen every time. I so rarely get gifts that I have a strong reaction which I think is what you guys really like to see when giving the gifts. Cash tips are always remembered, those clients will always have preference over a non-tipper.

    Just like with any service industry, you tip for good service. You tip your server, bartender, hair stylist, delivery person, maid, driver, etc, so you should also tip your provider. Out of the men I see probably 5% tip and I have mostly all repeat business.
    My rates aren’t high and I deliver good service and have a rapport with my clients, many I’ve been seeing consistently for over 2 years, and I’ve never gotten a tip from any of them. Many times it’s the newbies that tip and rarely someone who’s been in the hobby for a long time. Which I find most shocking, you’d think it’d be the other way around.

    • While I agree that Sex Work is a “service” industry, I don’t put Sex Workers in the same category as servers, bartenders, stylists, delivery persons, maids, etc. I would categorize Sex Workers alongside other service providers like psycologists, chiropractors, doctors, accountants, etc. Highly skilled, specialized people who provide a much higher end service. After all, people don’t pay a bartender 200, 300, 400 dollars an hour to pour drinks. We will pay a lawyer or a doctor or a Sex Worker that kind of money. When was the last time you tipped your lawyer or accountant?
      Just some thoughts.

      • Those highly skilled professions you listed also require extensive schooling and certifications.
        I don’t remember having to get a masters degree to spread my legs. Our profession is intimate on another level than most and knowing how to read people is a skill, none of it is learned in college. The jobs I listed don’t require a college degree. It mostly learned on the job skilled services, if you equate the amount of money you pay then subtract my daily overhead from your donation and that’s how much I got paid that day. My daily overhead runs about $250….

        • Agreed, lettucemeat. It annoys me when opponents are all like, “So… if prostitution becomes legal, will there be whore certification program that includes courses specializing in BJs?”

          umm… NO.

          Sex work is an interesting field with jobs that are mostly learned via experience, and most sex workers will progress professionally, intuitively, etc. as they continue to work overtime.

          Most jobs in the sex work industry are customer service oriented such as escorting. Customers are known to tip for a phenomenal service, and escorts appreciate cash tips from their clients. Gifts are welcome too; however, cash is king.

          I see escorts as freelancers who set their own prices, work whenever they want, provide their expertise/services to whoever they want, etc. while developing their skills, experience, reputation & creativity as time goes on.

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