A Public Apology
Hello readers. I made a huge mistake [on July 9th] that may have cost me the friendship of an amazing person. This tremendous error is a burden I now have to bear, and I offer her a public apology:
Dear Miss Sabrina Luv,
I want to offer to you my most sincere apologies. There is no other way to say it, than to say I screwed up tremendously last night. You have put much trust and faith in me and I returned that by breaking one of your basic—an easiest to follow—rules. I am an Idiot and a Fool.
I do wish to tell you what happened, not as an excuse. There is no excuse for my behavior. But I do hope that if you know, you will understand, and perhaps in time, forgive me.
My dearest Sabrina, I had been waiting with great excitement all day to see you. You know how excited I was. It had been 199 days since last we saw each other. A long time. Honestly, the anticipation was killing me. I had hoped you would be in town earlier, but you were hung up in traffic.
I was driving around, just trying to kill some time, when I received your text that you had not yet checked in to your hotel. A minute later as I was driving, you pulled out of a parking lot in front of me. It was a pure coincidence that I ended up behind you. A random event. At that point I was going to drive over to different place so I could return your text. But when I saw it was you I literally lost my mind. I forgot all protocol and etiquette. I just figured I could talk to you in person instead of texting you. So one block later I pulled into the hotel parking lot behind you and parked and came over.
I was not thinking. I offer no excuse. I know that I should not have come into the parking lot. I should not have approached your car. I should have kept driving. I should have been elsewhere.
It has been so long since I have seen you, that all I could think of was seeing you. I forgot that despite our friendship, despite the closeness we share, the Rules still exist. You have called me your best friend in the past, but I am also a client. And clients must follow the rules.
I am so sorry. Truly I am heart-broken that I have made such a huge error. I hold out some glimmer of hope that I have not fully destroyed our friendship. I hope that you can forgive me and give me another chance. I admit here, before everyone, that I am a fool. 199 days I waited for you. A short time more should have been easy. But I was stupid. Despite all my knowledge and words, I lacked wisdom last night.
Sabrina, please accept my apology. You have every right to be angry with me. I will understand if you do not reply to this. I will understand if you never talk to me again. I betrayed your trust, and there is no excuse for that. I just hope you might find forgiveness in your heart for a silly fool like me.
Take care of yourself, my dear Sabrina. You will always be the best. You will always be my favorite. You are the one who has healed me. You have often been my muse and inspiration. You gave me the confidence to even do this blog. I will forever be grateful for all you have done for me. Thank you for being the amazing person you are.
If this is good-bye, then know that I say so with great pain and love. Be well, my friend.
—Scott, an idiot